Tuesday, February 7, 2012

Process

There are times in life when things happen or things are said and you experience them as if you’re watching it or hearing it happen although you are doing or saying these things.  These out of body experiences can be big and small, but general are significant because I believe your soul is moving faster than your mind.  Your soul can also be your instinctual premise, either way your mind if following for once and it is with purpose and reason.

Discouraged I sat staring blankly at my computer screen this morning.  I was speaking to my wife at the time discussing the possibility of me going back to school.  Within this conversation I was saying that maybe I could get a scholarship since I’d be bringing in a 3.8 GPA and graduated Magna Cum Laude from college.  Throughout this process of trying o change career paths I’ve networked myself a lot, learned tons, and been more active than most people would be comfortable with trying to meet people.  Along the way, much like her comment towards my schooling, she encourages me and tells me how proud of me that she is to which I really think is sweet, but don’t understand.  She tells me I need to be confident and that I am very hard on myself to which I respond, “Well, I’m more of an end product thinker, I’m not one for process…”  I felt as if I was someone else watching me say this as I had one of those moments described above.  I didn’t know it consciously, but my unconscious put me in check with a statement that revealed what may be the essence of all the discouragement and downtimes I’ve had in this process.  This same inerrant line of thinking is what causes so much restlessness in others as well.  What is this misguided cognitive path? 

Many go through life and have been taught that arriving or achieving is the goal and so the process and journey don’t get much attention or appreciation.  Restlessness rules as we focus on a future state instead of appreciating where we are.  My wife teaches me great lessons of life without ever knowing it.  I think our large difference in how we interpret and experience life opens up opportunities to learn from each other, to which I am grateful.  She is a live in the moment type person, appreciates what is in front of you, embrace the process, and focus on what you’re doing or becoming rather than what you aren’t doing or are not.   How much of life’s beauty is taken away by overlooking it because there is a goal in mind?  How much of the learning process gets neglected because the end is held in such esteem?  If one is actively on a journey and working towards a goal they should appreciate the journey.  What a shame it’d be to live a life of providing for your family and doing things just to achieve the goal of raising children to succeed and not enjoy the journey.  To look back on that entire process as nothing of worth would be devastating.  What does it look like to appreciate journey? 

This is not to say achieving goals is so how evil.  Goals are essential to success in life.  These goals should not be more important than the path that leads to them however.  Imbalance either way is disastrous, not valuing goals and only focusing on living in the moment could allow one to float through life and achieve nothing.  Appropriate balance in appreciating the journey it takes to achieve a goal is the healthiest way to live.  This way of living is free of discouragement, doubt, regret, or low self-esteem.  To live in this balanced way, appreciating the process as well as the product is best for the soul and society.  Business would boom given a staff of employees who are appreciative of here and now while focusing on goals as well.  We’re all on some sort of journey and it is best to appreciate it.  More tips and tricks aren’t what we need, we need a paradigm shift.  The way we think is often more important than what we think about.  It is my prescription that we operate best when we appreciate the process along the way.  When you’ve reached your limit and worked and thought as hard as you can, it’s easy to think you are not enough or that somehow there is something wrong with you.  Instead of taking on more burdens and falling into the more and more mentality, maybe a simple change in how you consider things would be beneficial.  At times we focus so hard on what we can touch it leaves us ignoring the most important aspect of how we experience life, how we perceive it, our cognitive process.  A little work on that could go a long way.

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